What makes this story even more mortifying is the fact that this dude actually has 2 kids (one a daughter) himself. Drug use will do that to you though. For some people all it takes is one hit. For others it has to be prolonged and consistent use. Either way, the state of altered consciousness most of these recreational drugs provide can be blamed for a good number of violent crimes.
The good thing is, he now lives in torment (which for me works much better than a snappy death sentence). I hope he remains on death row for a while and also hope he loses his case in court.
The death row inmate says he’s left wracked with ‘guilt, shame and remorse’ after that July 2007 robbery which left Jennifer Hawke-Petit and her daughters, Michaela, 11, and Hayley, 17, raped and murdered.
BY NINA GOLGOWSKI / NEW YORK DAILY NEWS
In Steven Hayes’s first jailhouse interview from death row the 50-year-old inmate and father of two claims no one was supposed to die that horrific day in 2007.
A Connecticut death row inmate who raped and murdered a woman and her daughters has revealed in his first jailhouse interview more than six years later how he “just snapped.”
Steven Hayes, who says he now spends his days pacing his cell with “guilt, shame and remorse,” says no one was supposed to get hurt on that tragic day in July 2007.
“To this day, I don’t know why it happened,” the 50-year-old father of two told the New Haven Register. “I just wanted money. That’s all I was looking for.”
But Jennifer Hawke-Petit and her two daughters, Michaela, 11, and Hayley, 17, were found dead July 23 after Hawke-Petit and her youngest were first raped by Hayes and then his accomplice, Joshua Komisarjevsky.
Hawke-Petit’s husband, Dr. William Petit Jr., just managed to survive after being beaten with a baseball bat and tied up in the basement. He fled the home just after gasoline was emptied on his daughters’ bodies.
Both girls were still alive and conscious when the flame was set, the coroner said.
“It took a year before I could even remember what happened in those last few minutes,” Hayes told the paper. “I was told it was rage and stress or something. I just know that for a couple of minutes I became somebody else.”
It wasn’t supposed to end this way, according to Hayes. Still he says: “I can’t blame anybody but myself for the decisions that I made.”
After four and a half years of being sober and years of successful drug treatment, Hayes relapsed. His mother kicked him out of her home when she found out, and he had nowhere to go.
He needed money. “Quick money,” he calls it, so joined up with Komisarjevsky when they spotted Hawke-Petit and her daughter Michaela buying groceries at a Cheshire convenience store on July 22.
They “looked nice,” Komisarjevsky would later tell police of their selected victims.
Pictured is Dr. William Petit with his daughters Michaela, front, and Hayley, center rear, and his wife, Jennifer Hawke-Petit. Dr. Petit, who was beaten with a baseball bat, was the only survivor of the attack.
After following the pair home and dragging Petit into the home’s basement, Hayes forced Hawke-Petit behind the wheel of her car as Komisarjevsky stayed behind to watch her two girls.
Hayes directed Hawke-Petit to a bank where she withdrew $15,000.
“At that point, we were just going to leave. Nobody was going to get hurt – at least not by me,” he said.
But when Hayes and the girls’ mother re-entered the home, that all changed.
“That’s when Josh told me about him and the girl,” Hayes said about Komisarjevsky sexually assaulting the 11-year-old.
He claims Komisarjevsky insisted they had to kill the whole family.
“I started to lose it,” Hayes said. “Then I looked out the window and saw an unmarked police car. And I just snapped.”
Of what he did next, he says, “I’ve never done anything like that.”
He raped and strangled Hawke-Petit before the house and the girls were set fire to.
Asked who lit the flame, a question long left unanswered by the two brutes, Hayes now answers: “It wasn’t me.”
Dr. Petit was beaten, bound and tied to this post in his home’s basement on July 23, 2007, before his wife and daughters were raped and killed upstairs.
The pair was captured by police while attempting to flee the burning home.
Asked if there’s anything he’d say to Petit, who was left to live knowing what happened to his wife and two children, Hayes acknowledged he is unable to earn his forgiveness.
“I don’t know if there’s anything I could say. I definitely feel sorry but that doesn’t change things. I’d try to answer his questions,” he told the paper. “I don’t deserve to live,” he said. “I don’t want to live.”
Hayes’ disturbing recollections come after reaching out to the New Haven Register, claiming his desire to describe the “torment” he faces day to day.
He spends most of his day pacing, while usually too disturbed by his memories from that horrific day to watch TV or read.
“It’s in my head all day and all night,” he said. “I’ll never forgive myself for that.”
But the treatment by prison staff is beyond justified, he claims.
“Nobody’s supposed to be treated the way we’re treated here. I was sentenced to death, not psychological torment,” he said of what he claims are denials to basic human needs.
He describes it as psychological torture.
Hayes has since filed a civil suit in federal court accusing the faculty of denying him medical care and this regular “harassment and psychological torture” by jailers.
He is seeking $500,000 in damages.
Despite this sum, he says he wants to die, but believes he’ll live on death row until he’s old and gray – possibly without his son and daughter ever visiting.
“I realize now I’ve got to live with this pain. It’s something I’m supposed to live with,” he said.
Culled from nydailynews.com